Sunday, October 15, 2017

RE: Oct.14th.2017

I wake up Saturday morning of Oct 14th; I check my FB page, I am shocked to see the news of a massive explosion in Mogadishu. The pictures resemble an aftermath of an airstrike that demolished a whole neighborhood. There's no time for a panic attack, I quickly check with my sister in Mogadishu and ask if everyone was okay. I am especially worried about my little brother who's cordial and ever socializing.

Everyone from my immediate family was okay. Alhumdulilah.

I go on a hiking trip planned with friends. We discuss the news of Xamar Cadeey briefly. I go on autopilot mode; I think of all the what-ifs. The hiking starts and finishes while the picture of the explosion is alive in my head.

I go home and call Hoyoo (mother). Hoyoo says she was on a bus coming back from University, not very far from the place where the explosion took place. 'it was like an earthquake' she says. 'it shaken the whole city to the core, the city was sinking in black smoke.' 'two men who were riding the bus with me were very anxious and distressed; they started screaming at the bus driver to stop stopping at his usual stops in fear of a second explosion.' "Do not risk and waste our lives for 2000 shilling (almost $3.4) brother' they said, the bus driver didn't listen and continued following his normal route.'

Hoyoo mentioned another lady who got on the bus a few minutes later. She said 'when the explosion happened I was striding few inches away from the place where it happened, I had to check and touch my head couple of times to make sure everything was intact, I couldn't believe I wasn't bleeding."

As mother uttered these words, my horror grew more profound; my body felt number. My hoyoo was a few minutes away from the place of the deadly explosion that haunted few hundreds of our dear souls. Those dead humans had families that worried about them; a daughter like me may have checked on her mother, but her Hoyoo wasn't anywhere to be found. A sister checked on her brother, and she was directed to the hospital where he may or may not be alive. Hundreds are still buried under the rubles. Hundreds were blown up to pieces, and they will never have the honor to be buried as a whole. Hundreds are in life-threatening situation battling death in hospitals that are underfunded, unequipped, and with limited resources. Their blood is everywhere. Their bodies scattered into all directions. Many souls ascended to meet their creator Allah on Oct 14th, 2017.

What will those souls report to Allah, their creator, the one who placed them on earth? Will they talk about the harshness and cruelty of humans; fellow humans who were brainwashed to believe it was a noble cause to terrorize a whole city and explode a truck full of explosions?

Will they talk about how they fought the fear of death and decided to believe in our city and met their end in a restaurant while sipping cappuccino ? in a hotel while chilling with friends and batchmates? in a bus transit where they were headed for school or the market?

What will they say to Allah Sunhanhu wa ta'ala about the injustice that cut their lives short? About the wickedness of humans? About the grieve that will dissect the bereaved mother of four son's heart into million pieces every single minute? About the father who was flying to Mogadishu to attend his daughter's graduation instead attends her funeral?

When my family was deciding to move to Mogadishu, I encouraged my parents to make the move. Mogadishu is recovering. Mogadishu is healing, and with the birth of the Farmajo government, we were all optimistic. I never hesitated in my elation when my family booked their flight to Xamar, in fact, I, too, booked a trip to join them there in December Inshallah.

'Mogadishu cant be worst than Galkacyo, and I am the daughter of that city full of tension and instability' I rationalized. 'If my family survived there four years, they sure can survive in Xamar which is the capital city with tighter security.' Perhaps I was right or, maybe I was wrong.

All I know is this.

My hoyoo's words calming me down, ironically, when I said 'hoyoo I was too scared, too terrified for you guys when I read about the explosion.'

She said:

قُل لَّن يُصِيبَنَا إِلَّا مَا كَتَبَ اللَّهُ لَنَا هُوَ مَوْلَانَا ۚ وَعَلَى اللَّهِ فَلْيَتَوَكَّلِ الْمُؤْمِنُونَ (9:51)

Say: “Nothing shall ever happen to us except what Allah has ordained for us. He is our Maula (Lord, Helper, and Protector).” And in Allah let the believers put their trust.


My family is among millions who live in Xamar. Every day the residents of Mogadishu decide to live, to conquer death, to define resiliency, to clean the rails of blood and build gardens of peace 'Beeraha Nabada.' People were out to support in every way they can, they cued long lines under the hot sun to donate blood, and children were pictured collecting body pieces from the explosion scene.

Every child, every woman, every senior, and every man in Mogadishu is fighting a battle. They are children of war, they saw death and know his smell. And yesterday they met him again.

Us in the diaspora are in this with you too. We share the pain with you, brothers and sisters, even when we aren't there physically. We are also holding the burden and getting burnt without the fire. We have our loved ones living with you. Please, don't ever think we don't feel your pain. It's even worse living afar because we cant lend a hand.

Yesterday, if I were living in Mogadishu, you would've seen me in the cues donating blood or sweeping blood from the floors. Yesterday, you would've seen me drive people around or take them home. Please know that we feel your pain too.

I am still planning to go to Xamar cadeey come December inshallah. My wish is to visit and stand upon every corner where martyrs cleansed our land with their blood. I will not fear death nor terrorists. And if I meet my end there, my blood will mix with hundreds of my sisters and brothers; my soul will ascend to Allah believing in him and believing that nothing will happen unless decreed by Him.

 Mogadishu will rise again. Inshallah.


#PrayforMogadishu
#Mogadishu
#Mogadishuwillriseagain
#WeChooseNabadIyoNolol






Thursday, October 12, 2017

Poem:Wet Streets..

'Wet streets
wet trees
Dim lights
Shadows of doubt
And blurry lines..

Dark night
With no moon
Flashlights
With no excuse 
Uninvited. Unwanted. Declaring war on my thoughts.
Univited memories.
How dare you crawl into me..deep, deep within me.
An invasion,
on my solitude
on my state of apathy
disturbed yet immersed
In joy, and sadness
I despise this state of affairs 
So,
I declare resistance,
existence,
It ripples in the vacuum of my agony
Shadows of doubt arise. How dare you?
And on the wet streets,
I spot my reflection
I dare to stare
I see perfection'

#Poem #Rain #Mood
#Fallmood #Thoughts #Memories 

Monday, October 9, 2017

Hello Procrastination!

If procrastination were a disease I would ask all of you to ‘rush me to the hospital, ’ but it’s not. LUCKY ME. It may be negatively associated with some mental disorders like depression and ADHD but in its self, its not a psychological disorder (or a disease) for that matter, in fact, the human race has procrastinated since the dawn of history-putting things off is in our DNA; SO NORMAL! 

For the longest time I thought I was just a lazy person who enjoys the state of doing nothing but Naah, it turned out that I am an avid procrastinator. Procrastination should be my middle name. I think I should be called Asia the Procastinator..sounds cool right?

Laziness is inactivity and unwillingness to act; an apathy state, while procrastination is an active process-you choose to do something else instead of the task you know, you should be doing. (For example, me writing this article instead of preparing my midterm exam on Wednesday ‘which is obviously a high-priority task instead I opt to write this piece, funny right?’

Which one are you? A lazy person or a procrastinator?
But how do we beat procrastination? (this is me thinking out loud and sharing the process with yall), How do we overcome this state of dilly-dallying? If we want to get things done or reach our future goals, then this is a massive obstacle, right?

By giving in to this impulse, we face serious consequences like feeling guilty or ashamed or being unproductive and missing out on achieving our goals.
I liken this situation to the person who thinks they’re walking (or running for that matter) but remains in the same spot expecting results. 
How can we expect results if we don’t really put in any real efforts..?
If we want to change that behavior then there are several things we should do:

First: Recognize that you’re procrastinating

If you don’t acknowledge the act, then we cant change it. You might be putting off a task because you genuinely had to re-prioritize and adjust your schedule, that’s not procrastination. But if you start to put things off indefinitely, or begin with the low-priority tasks when you know there’s something more important you should be doing then that’s procrastination. (I admit I am procrastinating right now while writing this piece lol)

Second: Work out the why.Why are you delaying?

Boring task? If so try to get it out of the way so you can enjoy the other parts of your day.

Unorganized? I have been told that organized people successfully overcome procrastination because of their prioritized to-do-lists and fancy efficient schedules. These tools help you to deal with procrastination; chunking tasks up make them look more manageable, less overwhelming and more doable instead of worrying about the full project it may help if you create an outline or a plan for attack and scheduling each part (not literary attacking of course)

Perfectionist ? Perfectionists usually have a mentality of ‘all or none.' They usually prefer ‘avoiding’ a task if they feel like they don’t have the skills to do it. Don’t do that. It’s better to do a fairly-good-job then not do the task at all.

Honestly, the reason I procrastinated this long weekend (we had three-days long weekend) and didn’t get any non-leisure activities done, is because I set too many goals and have so many expectations from myself. (Maybe I should include that in the previous list ‘expecting too much from yourself when I have an honest conversation with myself and try to write down my to-do-list. It turns out to be whole-book of a to-do-list. (Seriously, they do)

Things that need to be done at home.
Things that need to be done at work.
Things that need to be done to establish my own business
Things that I need to do for self-care purposes.
Things I have to read aka.books.
The list goes on..And on.

Till I am overwhelmed.
Till I am bored from my own lists and they give me a headache.
Till I decide to quit the whole process and decide to go back to my binge-watching  (Hello procrastination!!)

I guess I need to go easy on myself, make a grand plan (I am so good at making plans it's not even funny, maybe I should be a professional plan maker or something) Anyway, chunk things up!!!
So how do I chunk things up?
By deciding on the most significant task of all.
Apparently, at work, you should have a prioritized to-do-list that you follow, learn how to do things as they come up instead of letting them pile up.

But my struggle isn't even there.
My procrastination magnifies when it comes to studying, learning my Deen, working on my self-development, pursuing my dreams.
We all have the same amount of time, yet some people manage to use it more efficiently while the rest of us procrastinate and sleep. (You included)

So how do we overcome this nasty habit?
Of course, procastination is a habit, a deeply ingrained pattern of behavior which you cant break overnight but can change by being self-aware and working hard on improving it.

Which leads me to my third point.

Third: Strategies we can implement to overcome this habit

*Forgive yourself for your past procrastinations: this will make you feel good and confident about yourself and reduce the chances of you procrastinating

*Commit to a task when you chunk up the bigger tasks; focus on doing instead of avoiding.

*Promise yourself a reward: like being able to check your social media or watch an episode of your favorite T.V show only when you done with the task your committed to (I used this strategy last Tuesday when I had to sit on a paper for over 11 hours, I placed my phone downstairs and promised myself to check it only when I am done with a certain number of pages)

*Ask someone to check on you: the pressure of answering to someone (aside from yourself) will make you be more accountable and help you to self-monitor.
*Use your inner-dialog: use phrases that encourage you like ‘I can do this’ instead of ‘this task cant be done’ or ‘it’s impossible.' Use phrases that empower you. It works.

*Minimize distractions: Avoid checking your phone or emails while doing the delegated task or any random Google searches.


I hope this article helped. I personally will start practising those tips Inshallah and will let you know how things go. 

Here's a nice quote on procrastination 

💖

#procrastination
#schedules
#Prioritization 
#Lifestyle












Sunday, October 1, 2017

Isn't Appalling..

'Isn't appalling,
How a simple odor can trigger memories, 
How memories trigger wounds.
How wounds make a rise.
Crawl back to your consciousness
And just like that, you regress. relapse.
Restart your calendar.
Back to zero.
But its OK. You ain't a super hero
Those memories didn't happen. They should be forgotten.
But how, how do you avoid all that once triggered your senses?
All that made you once enthralled.'



By:Asia Aboosy 

💖


#Poetry 
#WritingMode 
#Relationships
#Narcissism 
#Memories&Senses